I never imagined that one day, when I was pregnant, he would beg me to get rid of that child.
If… if that child had been born back then, they would be a year old now. Would it have been a boy or a girl? Who would they have looked like? What would their personality have been like? if only…
I understand James, I know him too well. He lost his father at a young age and knows how important a father is in a child’s growth.
Plus, he’s always been such a responsible person. He wouldn’t abandon that mother
Sometimes, I can’t help but think maliciously: if I had given birth to that child back then, who would James have chosen? How would he have balanced everything?
If I had been more selfish… but then I think, if my own child had to compete with another child for that bit of fatherly love, wouldn’t that be too tragic?
How could I let myself fall into such a pitiful state?
It’s good, it’s good that my marriage to James only lasted three years. Sometimes I regret that it was so short.
If it had been longer, if James had fallen in love with me, would it have been a bit harder for him to choose?
But sometimes I’m grateful. It’s good that it was so short. I hadn’t fallen too deep yet. I still had a chance to get out.
I will eventually find someone who will love me wholeheartedly.
I leaned my head against the window. Actually, I could have held it in. What was there that I couldn’t endure?
Since childhood, the family education I received was all about endurance. Thoughts, manners, behavior, speech–only by enduring could one be reserved, graceful, and polite. But how could I not hate it?
Torrential tears ravaged beneath my eye mask us I cried silently.
In this corner where no one could see, no one knew of my distress, and no one saw my heartbreak.
Delphi wasn’t the center of the world. Those two doves circled half the globe, and at the moment they met, they continued forward. It wasn’t the beginning of a beautiful story.
It was just a very ordinary, insignificant, unnoticed little episode, with regret as light as a sigh.
