Chapter 21 Restless Heart
|| Lilac’s POV ||
The day had been long, too long. My body felt heavy, my mind a tangled mess of emotions I couldn’t quite unravel. I skipped dinner, unable to stomach the thought of food, and retreated to my room, collapsing onto the bed with a sigh. The cool sheets were a welcome relief against my skin, but they did little to ease the storm raging inside me.
Mom had knocked on my door multiple times, her voice soft and concerned.
“Sweetpea, are you okay? Do you need anything?” she’d asked, her worry evident in every word. I’d assured her I was fine, but the truth was, I wasn’t. I wasn’t okay at all.
How could I be? Last night with Alaric had been… beyond anything I’d ever experienced. The way he’d looked at me, the way he’d touched me, the way he’d made me feel, it was overwhelming. My cheeks burned at the memory, my heart racing as I replayed every moment in my mind.
His hands on my skin, rough yet tender, sending shivers of electricity through me. His lips on mine, fierce and demanding, yet somehow gentle, as if he were afraid I might break. The way he’d whispered my name, his voice low and rough with emotion, sending a thrill down my spine. And the way he’d held me afterward, his arms strong and steady, as if he never wanted to let me
- go.
But then I’d left. I’d slipped out of his bed while he was still asleep, my heart pounding as I’d gathered my clothes and tiptoed out of the room. I hadn’t been able to face him, hadn’t been able to face the emotions swirling inside me. And now, lying here in the quiet of my room, I couldn’t shake the guilt that gnawed at me.
I sighed, running a hand through my hair as I stared up at the ceiling. The window was open, the cool night breeze brushing against my skin, but it did little to calm the storm inside me. I closed my eyes, trying to push the thoughts away, but they refused to be silenced.
Suddenly, I heard a low noise, a faint rustling, barely more than a whisper against the silence of the night. My heart skipped a beat.
My eyes flew open.
A shadow moved./
For a second, fear clawed at my chest, sharp and unforgiving. Then the figure stepped through the window, and my breath caught in my throat.
Alaric.
He moved with a quiet, predatory grace, his grey eyes locked onto mine like a hunter who had finally cornered his prey. The dim light from the moon cast shadows over his face, highlighting the sharp angles of his jaw, the storm of emotions raging in his gaze. His dark hair was tousled, the remnants of sleep or, more likely, restlessness. But it wasn’t just his presence that sent shivers down my spine.
It was the way he looked at me.
Like I was his.
Like I had betrayed him.
“Wh… what are you doing here?” I stammered, my voice barely above a whisper, but the silence that followed was louder than any words could have been.
“How did you get in?” I was surprised too since the entire area was under dad and no one could get past the security with easy, let alone standing inside my bed room.
Alaric didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.
The air in the room grew thick, charged with something dangerous, something primal.
His jaw tightened as he took slow, deliberate steps toward me, his movements calculated yet filled with a barely restrained intensity. I instinctively backed away, my breath shallow, my pulse thrumming wildly beneath my skin. My back hit the wall, and I sucked in a sharp breath, realizing I was trapped.
Trapped between the past and the present.
Trapped between my fear and my longing.
I should have make noise, I should have yelled or something, instead I stayed frozen for a good
moment.
His hands came up, caging me in, his palms resting against the wall on either side of my head. The space between us was nonexistent. His warmth pressed against me, his scent of pine and stormy air wrapping around me like a net.
“Alaric,” I whispered, my voice trembling as he closed the distance between us.
“Oh, so you still know me,” he murmured, his voice a blade edged with something I couldn’t name, pain, possession, fury.
Guilt curled in my stomach like a fist.
I swallowed hard, my mind racing as I searched for words, any words, to explain. “It’s… not like that,” I mumbled, but even to my own ears, it sounded like a lie.
His lips twisted into something that wasn’t quite a smirk. “Not like what, Lilac?” he asked, his tone deceptively soft, but the anger simmering beneath it sent a fresh wave of heat down my spine.
I opened my mouth, but he cut me off.
“How dare you leave my side without a word?” he said, his voice sharp and cutting, each syllable landing with precision. “Are you trying to shake me off?”
“You slept with me,” he growled, his breath warm against my skin, sending shivers down my spine. His fingers twitched against the wall, like he was holding himself back, barely restraining whatever storm raged inside him. “And then you sneaked out.”
His words were laced with something more than anger.
Hurt.
And that realization was what shattered whatever defense I had left.
“Tell me, Lilac.” His voice dropped lower, huskier, rough with emotion. “Do you regret it?”
His
eyes burned into mine, and for the first time, I saw it. The flicker of pain. The war inside him. Jealousy. Hope. Heartache. Possession.
It gutted me.
A lump formed in my throat, my guilt tightening like a noose.
I had left.
Not because I regretted it.
But because I didn’t.
Because this was dangerous. Because he was dangerous. Because I had spent every second convincing myself that wanting him was a mistake.
But I couldn’t lie to him now.
“Alaric…” His name was a whisper on my lips, fragile yet heavy with everything I couldn’t say. My fingers trembled as I reached up, my touch hesitant as I cupped his face.
His skin was warm beneath my palms, his stubble rough against my fingertips. A spark ran through my skin.
His eyes darkened, his breath hitching as I leaned in, closing the distance between us.
And then my lips brushed against his.
Soft. Tentative. A stark contrast to the fire between us. I must be out of my mind! He was a Reventhorn, one of those who ended my life. But still here I was, longing him.
His entire body stiffened, like he hadn’t expected it, like he had prepared for my rejection
instead.
I pulled back just enough to whisper against his lips, my voice trembling but full of truth. “I’will never regret it,” I breathed, my heart pounding so hard I was sure he could feel it.
“Never,” I repeated, and in that moment, I knew, this wasn’t just about last night.
It had never been just one night.
For a moment, Alaric didn’t move, his body tense as if he were fighting to hold himself back. But then, with a low growl, he kissed me back, his lips fierce and demanding, his hands sliding down to my waist as he pulled me closer. The kiss was filled with raw emotion, a mix of anger, passion, and something deeper, something I couldn’t quite name.
When we finally broke apart, both of us were breathless, our chests rising and falling in sync. Alaric’s eyes were dark with desire, his expression one of quiet intensity as he looked down at me.
“Don’t ever do that again,” he said, his voice low and filled with emotion. “Don’t ever leave me like
that.”
I nodded, my heart pounding in my chest as I looked up at him.
“I won’t,” I said, my voice steady despite the storm of emotions raging inside me. “I promise.”
What spell are you putting me under, Alaric?
Alaric’s expression softened, his hands sliding up to cup my face as he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against mine.
“You’re mine, dove,” he said, his voice a low growl. “And I’m not letting you go.”
I felt a shiver run down my spine at his words, the possessiveness in his tone sending a thrill through me. But there was something else there too, something softer, something that made my chest ache with a warmth I hadn’t felt in a long time.
For a moment, we just stood there, our breaths mingling as we held each other close. The world outside the room ceased to exist, the worries and fears that had been plaguing me fading into the background. All that mattered was the heat between us, the fire that burned brighter with every touch, every kiss, every whispered word.
And as I lay there in Alaric’s arms, the warmth of his body against mine, I felt a flicker of hope. The future was uncertain, but for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was in control.
And that was enough.
