Hearing him bring up the word ‘punished’, my heart sank to my stomach. The tears I’d been fighting away broke free. Pouring down my face.

“No, no, please. I’m begging. I’m begging you, I didn’t know. I’ll never wear pink again. I’ll never wear silk again.” I tried. I tried everything to explain, but Matthias had that look that I was used to. The look that said he was thinking of Nerissa and the sight of me made him sick.

“You never learn. I have to tell you this over and over. You will never be her. You can never be, Nerissa. She was amazing. I would have sold your soul in place of hers.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re always sorry! Always fucking sorry. Go to the study, and kneel there. This time I’m giving you twelve hours to learn your lesson.”

I froze. That was the longest time he’d ever given me. Twelve hours? Oh my god. I’ve done it right for months, trying to avoid being punished. The last time I was there for eight hours and I nearly starved to death. I ended up passing out due to dehydration.

“Please, don’t do this. I made a mistake.”

But it was too late. He was calling for his head servants, and I could only cry as the grip on my wrist got even tighter. It didn’t hurt as much as what I’m about to face. I have to tell him now, or I’ll never get another chance. He might not want sex for another month or so. I have to say it now that I have his attention.

“Matthias, wait! I’m pregnant!” I shouted. His bedroom door was thrown open, two servants marched in. Turning their eyes to their master, waiting for his command.

He stopped, then tossed me into their arms. “You lie way too much.”

“I’m not lying, I’m pregnant. I’m really pregnant.” I tried again. He marched closer, grabbing me by the jaw, effectively silencing me.

“I always use a condom, so unless you’ve been fucking someone else on the side, you’re not fucking pregnant. God, always lying. You expect me to believe a worthless, unworthy woman like you is carrying my child?” he scoffed.

“Get her out of my sight, take her to the study, and watch the door. She’s not to leave for the next twelve hours. Not for water, not for clothes, and not for food.”

“Yes, sir.” Both servants responded before dragging me away. I was numb for a second as his words kept ringing in my ears. He doesn’t believe me. For a split second, I wanted to say I could try and convince him, but I quickly shut that down as the servants tossed me into the study. They didn’t slam the door until they saw me move my shaky body into the right formation.

Kneeling in front of a massive painting. A massive painting of Nerissa. The numbness I’d felt slowly started to fade, and I heard myself sob. I felt detached, cold, hurt in the heart, and in my flesh. My wolf felt smaller. I thought. I really thought…. I mean, it’s a baby.

I know I’m pregnant; I took the test twice. He didn’t even ask to take me to a doctor, he flat-out called me a liar.

Three years. Three years of this, and he still hated me. I didn’t kill Nerissa. I have no clue what happened during that trip. If I could go back, I’d have refused even harder when she kept begging me to accompany her.

I couldn’t look at her picture. If I died today, there wouldn’t be a trace of me in the house. There isn’t a photo, not of our wedding, and not of me at all. But Nerissa is everywhere.

My tears dripped onto the floor. How much can one girl take? Three years and, he hadn’t changed a bit. The nicest interaction I’d had from him was that drunken night. He seemed like an entirely different person.

I brought a hand up to wipe my tears. I keep crying, and it’s started to annoy me. My heart burns; it doesn’t feel like it’s working anymore. I looked up at the photo of Nerissa. In this, she’s smiling, her head tilted back, black dress flowing in the wind as she’s surrounded by flowers. She looks happy, sweet, and innocent.

Everyone, even my parents, bought her act. But she’s a demon. If it wasn’t for that incident when I was a child, Nerissa would have been at an orphanage for the rest of her life.

And call me mean, but that would have been better for my life than what I have now.

Why did I say yes to this marriage? I could have, should have run off and gotten myself accepted into another pack. Yes, I’d be branded a rogue for leaving my pack without reason, but it would have been better than what I’d doomed myself to. Three years is how long I’ve been married to Matthias.

But it’s been longer than that since I was introduced to who should have been my sibling. Someone who had my best interests in mind. But that was never Nerissa. She hated me from the moment we met. And even in her death, I’m still being tormented.

Things were tolerable until that night. The stupid night when I decided to go on that trip with her.