Have Some Thoughts Chapter 1

Have Some Thoughts Chapter 1

Have some thoughts 

It was our third anniversary. Jason, my husband

was keeping a secret from everyone, a young

vibrant girl tucked away somewhere. Everyone 

always told me I was his forever girl,his 

weakness. But then he’d get drunk and laugh

saying, Marrying Amelia? Turns out, she’s 

justokay.The man who swore at seventeen 

he’d love me forever was now cuddling another 

girl, whispering, She’s so boring, of course

you’re the one I really love, babe.” 

The day I left was ordinary. No one suspected

thing. Maria, our housekeeper, smiled and 

asked if I was going shopping or for coffee.

smiled back and nodded, Don’t bother with 

dinner tonight.Jason wouldn’t know it, but 

just okayAmelia was stubborn. Forgiveness 

wasn’t in her vocabulary

I clutched my coat, a bag of liver supplements 

in my hand. The hallway stretched out

paintings casting splashes of color in the 

lamplight. At the end of the hall, laughter spilled 

from a room. Jason rented this entire floor

permanently. No one was allowed up here

which explained why the door was ajar. My heel 

caught on the thick carpet. As I bent down, my 

pearl necklace snapped. Pearls scattered 

across the floor. A sharp pang hit my chest.

reached for them, then froze. I heard Jason’s 

voice

Nah, I’m not like you guys, always chasing the 

next thing.His voice, thick with alcohol, oozed 

pride. My first love, my dream girl, the love of 

my life, is my wife, and only my wife.My lips 

curved into a smile. The cool pearls in my hand 

felt soothing. My heart feltlighter

Then he sighed. Too bad she’s kind ofmeh.” 

My hand clenched, pearls digging into my palm

My smile faltered

What about me, Jason?A sweet, young voice, laced with hurt and resentment. You say your 

wife is the love of your life. Then what am I?” 

You said you loved me last night!” 

The other men erupted in laughter. Silly girl, you believe what a man says in bed?Besides

he’s supposed to love his wife.You’re the 

side chick, what do you expect?” 

Jason! Tell them!The girl’s voice cracked 

with tears. She sounded genuinely heartbroken

Alright, cut it out, guys.Jason’s voice 

deepened. He sounded annoyed. Side chick

She’s my girlfriend. Show some respect.” 

No way, man. You serious?” 

Jason hummed in affirmation. She’s been with 

me since she was eighteen. I have to take 

responsibility.” 

Dude, you’re a predator. Barely legal and you 

swoop in.” 

Aren’t you worried Amelia will find out?” 

Jason chuckled. She depends on me. What’s 

she gonna do?” “But keep your mouths shut.

love my wife. I don’t want to hurt her.” 

You love your wife? Then what am I?The 

girl’s voice was pleading

Jason pulled her close. Don’t cry over 

something so small.” 

She sobbed, clinging to him. Jason, tell me you 

love meEven if it’s a lie, I just want to hear 

95 

There, there, babe. She’s so boring, of course. you’re the one I really love.” 

I stood in the shadows, a laugh escaping my 

lips. The man who swore he’d love me forever was now comforting another girl. But I didn’t even want to confront him. Once a cheater, always a cheater

I turned and walked back down the long 

hallway. Seventeenyearold Jason carving my name into his desk. Jason loves Amelia, forever

His forever lasted a mere ten years

That evening, Jason came home to find me eating breakfast. He rushed in with flowers and gifts, his face full of apology. I’m so sorry. honey. The meeting went really late last night. I couldn’t make it back.He promised he’d never spend a night away, no matter how busy he was. But lately, he’d been coming home later and later. This time, he hadn’t come home at 

all

I put down my fork and looked at him. He’d 

changed his clothes. He smelled clean and 

fresh. He’d covered his tracks well. He set the 

flowers down, leaning in for a kiss. Honey,

swear, this was the first time, and it’ll be the 

last.” 

I stopped him. Did you stay at the office last 

night?” 

Without hesitation, he said. Yes. See? These 

are the clothes you packed for me.He took my 

shoulders, his eyes searching mine. Honey, are 

you mad?I’ll spend the whole day with you.

won’t go to the office, okay?” 

I stared back, at my reflection in his eyes. His 

gaze was steady, unwavering. No guilt. And 

somehow, I managed to hide my own pain

No,I said, pulling away. Let’s eat.” 

He’d barely sat down when his phone rang. He 

frowned and declined the call. It rang again. He 

hesitated, then declined it again. Then a text 

came through. Jason’s face tightened

Amelia, something carne up at work” 

Go,I said

No, I promised youhe started, but his eyes 

betrayed him

It’s fine. Work is more important. Go.I looked 

at him, the ache in my chest numb

He didn’t need much convincing. I’ll try to be 

back early.” 

I hummed, watching him rush out to his car

Only then did I realize tears were streaming 

down my face. I called my best friend, Sarah

Sarah, can you book me a checkup at your 

hospital today?” 

The results brought a wave of relief. I was 

clean. I wasn’t pregnant. My health had been 

fragile when we married, so we hadn’t planned 

on children. Still, I’d needed to be sure. Doctor

how’s my health overall?The doctor’s 

reassurance eased the knot in my stomach

Leaving the doctor’s office, I heard Jason’s 

name. I stopped. Jason, if I am pregnant, can

keep it?I watched them from the corner

Jason, cigarette dangling between his fingers

looked impatient. The girl, face bare of makeup

was crying, pleading with him

He scoffed. “My wife hasn’t had kids yet. You 

think you’re next in line?” 

But it’s my first baby. I can’t” 

I’ll be good, I promise! I won’t be any trouble.” 

And your wife will never know about me or the 

baby.” 

He patted her cheek. Don’t be naive

sweetheart. You’re not keeping this baby.Be 

a good girl, get rid of it, and I’ll buy you

condo.But if you don’tChloe, let me be 

clear. Your college is full of pretty, obedient 

girls. I can replace you in a heartbeat. I don’t 

need you.” 

Terror washed over her face. I’ll be good

Jason. Please don’t leave me.” 

Good. Go get checked.” 

She sniffled. I will. ButJason, you said your 

wife can’t have kidsIf I am pregnant

maybemaybe it could be like I’m having it for 

her. She could raise it. I won’t fight her. I won’t 

say anything. Okay?” 

He paused. Get checked first. We’ll talk after.” 

She went into the examination room. Jason 

finished his cigarette and turned around.

pretended I’d just arrived. He seemed startled

then quickly switched to a concerned 

10:23 

95 

expression. Amelia! What are you doing here?Are you sick? Are you hurt?” 

He grabbed my arm, his concern radiating off him. He looked like he’d been worried sick. Like his love for me hadn’t faded in the slightest. My hands and feet went cold. A chill ran down my spine. How could he act so convincingly? He called me honeywhile his mistress was in the next room, finding out if she was carrying his child. And he did it all without a flicker of guilt.

almost couldn’t tell which Jason was the real 

one

I’m fine,I said. Just visiting a friend.” 

He exhaled, pulling me into a hug. You scared 

me, honey.” 

Were you worried about me?I asked softly

Of course, I was worried!He held me tight

You were so sick when we got married.

spent three years nursing you back to health.” 

Honey, you don’t know how terrified I was 

when I saw you here.What would I do if 

anything happened to you?” 

I wanted to laugh, but my lips wouldn’t move

They trembled, as if I’d swallowed hot oil

What are you doing here?I asked

His grip tightened. Visiting arelative. He’s in 

the hospital.” 

This was the maternity ward. But I didn’t say

word

On the drive home, Jason’s phone kept ringing

He finally switched it off. I don’t care if the 

president calls, I’m staying home with you 

tonight.” 

I stared out the window, watching the familiar 

streets roll by. Our high school. The memories

once sweet, now felt like honeycoated knives 

twisting in my gut. My vision blurred. For

moment, I saw us, younger

Have Some Thoughts Novel

Have Some Thoughts Novel

Status: Ongoing

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