Chapter 3 Choosing Myself
Nevea
I never thought packing my stuff could be this hard. Every item I shoved into my suitcase felt like tearing pieces of my life
with Kai. The life I had imagined would last forever.
I bit back tears when I stared at the empty closet. I couldn’t believe this was
happening. How had we come to this? We were supposed to be together for life. But instead, here I was, about to leave. I wiped my tears. Now was not the moment to be
weak. I was worth more than this.
My phone vibrated, and it was Ivar. He seemed unfinished with his lecture.
“Nevea, please don‘ t make any rash decisions. I’m sure Kai will fix this. He is just a little busy. Give him time to make it up to you.”
I scoffed and rolled my eyes.
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“Fix this? How could he? Where was he? He canceled without thinking twice. He didn’t even think of me. And I have to understand him,” I hissed and ignored Ivar.
I shoved the last shirt into the suitcase, trying to forget about the supposed mating ceremony. I had dreamt of walking down the aisle with the entire pack watching. But today, when it was supposed to happen, Kai’s eyes went to Claire, who faked another injury. I couldn’t count how many times she had done it and how blind Kai was about this.
“Damn them!”
I zipped the suitcase, grabbed my luggage, and went out. I never told anyone, not even Nana Lolita, who loves me a lot. The Uber I booked was already outside waiting. I rushed to stuff my things inside the car’s trunk and went inside, instructing the driver to leave. I stared out the window with a heavy heart as each passing street reminded me of the life I left behind. I had
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fought for so long, but now I was done. I was taking back control, even if it hurt.
When I arrived at my old apartment, I stared at it before going in. I had lived here. less than a year, and it felt like home, comforting but painful. I wished to become the old me, full of hope and love for Kai.
I dragged my suitcase, and its weight felt lighter compared to what was in my chest. When I reached the bedroom, the small space felt foreign to me, but I welcomed the change. As I unpacked, I tried to push thoughts of Kai from my mind, but they kept creeping back in.
Just as I was setting up my bed, my phone vibrated again. I hesitated before picking it up, thinking it would probably be Ivar or Claire. But when I saw the name on the screen, my heart raced.
It was Kai.
My breath was wailing as I read through the message.
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“Nevea, please. Can we talk? I need to see
you.”
I stared at the screen, my heart pounding. Did he really think he could just fix things with a simple message? After everything?
I was shaking when I was typing my reply.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea right now.”
Before I could even put the phone down, it rang, and Kai was calling. I hesitated, my finger hovering over the decline button, but something stopped me. I took a deep
breath and answered.
“What do you want, Kai?” I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.
“Nevea, it shouldn’t go this far. Let’s talk about this, please,” he said with a mix of desperation and warmth.
“Why? So, you can cancel again? So, you can tell me how much you care while still prioritizing Claire?” My voice rose, anger flaring up again.
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“No! I wanted to explain… I know that you are hurt. I understand it. This is not because of Claire. I am an Alpha, and I’m responsible for every pack member’s safety. She is my responsibility.”
I scoffed, shaking my head even though he couldn’t see me.
“Kai, she’s always injured. Don’t you find it a little odd?”
“Come on, Nevea! Anything can happen during training. You will always get hurt as you learn new fighting skills. Injury is all part of learning. Any child could understand that,” Kai said with irritation.
“Are you trying to say that I am childish? And Claire getting injured all the time is not behaving like one?”
“No, it’s not like that. You have every right to be upset. We have been preparing for the mating ceremony for months. But you know we can never predict what will happen. Luckily, Claire’s injury was not
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that bad. She will heal in a day or two. We could schedule again the mating ceremony. What is a day or two delay?”
“I can’t do this right now,” I finally said, my voice trembling.
“Nevea, please! I just need you to hear me out. Can we at least meet? Just to talk?” Kai pleaded.
“Talk? About what? About how you chose Claire over me? You know what? I’m done. hearing excuses.”
“It’s not an excuse! I just need a moment. to explain everything. I thought you‘ d understand my position of being an Alpha. This isn’t just about us.”
“Right. Because your responsibilities are clearly more important than our relationship. I get it, Kai. But that doesn’t change how I feel.”
He sighed, and I could hear the frustration
in his breath.
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“You‘ re right, it doesn’t. But I never wanted to hurt you. I just wanted to do what was best for the pack. You know I care about you, don’t you?”
“Do I? Because it sure doesn’t feel that way. You keep saying you care, but your actions tell a different story.”
Kai was about to argue about his responsibilities. He couldn’t stop. I felt like
a child he had to lecture because I couldn’t understand what it was to be Alpha. I ended the call without asking for
permission. Kai called again, and I didn’t
pick up. Instead, I turned off my phone.
