hapter 61
*Jiselle*
The world was too loud, even in silence.
I don’t remember consciously leaving the dorm–I just remember running. My legs carried me before my mind could catch up, and every breath I took felt like it might be my last. I barely registered the stone floor beneath my feet, the flicker of sconces along the hallway walls, or the echo of students whispering in passing.
The only thing I could hear was the frantic beat of my own heart and the words still ringing in my head.
When the veil thins and the moon weeps…
I needed air. I needed to move. I needed to not be inside this place that suddenly felt too small for my skin.
I turned a sharp comer and slammed into someone.
Hard.
“Shit!” the person barked, stumbling backward. “Watch where you-”
Emari.
Of all people.
I braced myself for the snark, the venom she always carried on the tip of her tongue like a dagger. I opened my mouth to apologize–or to growl, depending on what she said first–but the jab never came.
Emari blinked at me, something flickering in her eyes. Confusion… maybe even concern?
“What the hell’s wrong with you?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. Just a shuddered breath.
Her eyes traveled over me–my wild hair, my clenched fists, my flushed skin–and for once, she didn’t follow up with another insult. Her gaze dropped to the book still clutched in my hand, and then to my other hand where my nails were digging into my palm.
I didn’t know what she saw in my face, but it was enough to make her pause.
“You look like you saw a ghost,” she muttered, brows pinching. “Or like someone’s about to die.”
She started to step around me, and that’s when I saw it–half–tucked beneath her arm, clutched almost absentmindedly in her grip.
A dagger.
One not unlike the one Bastain gave me. But it wasn’t identical. Its handle was thinner, sleeker. Etched not with lunar symbols, but with sharp, clean lines that reminded me of the one Max carried during sparring days. I froze.
“Where did you get that?” I asked, my voice hoarse.
Emari blinked, then looked at the dagger like she’d forgotten she was holding it.
“This?” she said casually. “They handed them out earlier in combat class. Everyone’s supposed to have one for the Solstice.” She looked at me like I was slow. “Didn’t you get yours?”
My throat closed.
“Everyone?” I echoed. “Everyone got one?”
She nodded. “Yeah. Whole first–year division. Something about preparing for the expression trials and being properly ‘tied‘ to our own life forces for the test. Whatever that means.” She rolled her eyes. “Moon forbid they actually explain anything around here.”
I took a step back. My pulse thundered in my ears.
“Oh right,” she continued with pursed lips. “You just got discharged today didn’t you? So you haven’t gotten yours yet.” she scoffed. “So much for peace and quiet in the dorm. I’m glad you’re not dead though.”
I didn’t even have time to register the almost compliment from this woman. I just stared at the dagger. It was getting too real. ‘Expression trials‘ my ass. They were preparing us for our gifts.
Tied to your life forcel
The daggers weren’t just ceremonial. They we
Successfully unlocked!
dangerous. Something deeply personal.
How they know.‘ Tied to our life force. The blood oaths. The Scars. It was almost our time.
The dagger Bastain gave me was different. It was meant to suppress my gift but who knows what this new dagger was for?
Max’s dagger had been like that. Tied to him. The one Rastais
Chapter 61
And now they were handing them out like party favors?
Emari must’ve seen the color drain from my face because her smirk faltered. “Okay, what the hell is going on with you?”
I didn’t answer.
I turned on my heel and ran.
“Jiselle!” Emari called after me, but I didn’t stop.
I couldn’t.
My boots pounded down the corridor, past startled students, past instructors who barely glanced up from their conversations. I didn’t stop until I burst out into the back doors of the academy and stumbled into the forest that hugged the edge of the grounds.
Cool air slammed into me, brushing across my overheated skin like a slap. I gasped, bent forward, and tried to breathe. My lungs weren’t cooperating.
The trees loomed tall above me, their leaves rustling in the wind. Shadows stretched long across the ground as the last traces of daylight died behind the mountains. I moved deeper into the woods, where no one could see me. No one could ask questions.
I finally stopped near a fallen tree, gripping the bark until it scraped my palms.
Then I broke.
My knees hit the mossy earth and I curled into myself, shaking, gasping. My chest heaved: My vision blurred. It wasn’t just fear–it was everything. The council. The book. The prophecy. The name. The Solstice. The daggers.
I pressed my hand to my heart, trying to hold myself together.
What am I?
The answer screamed back at me: I don’t know.
A buzz rippled down my spine, sudden and sharp.
Nate.
I could feel him.
For the first time since the mark, he pushed through our link–not gently, not with words, but with pure emotion. His worry struck me like lightning. His need to find me. His voice, faint but rising, echoed in my mind.
“Jiselle. Where
His voice sooou? I
feel you spiraling; come back. Please.”
and fractured me in the same breath.
I clutched my head, squeezing my eyes shut.
“Not now,”
whispered.
I couldn’t let him in. Not right now.
I shut him out, gently but firmly, the way Dad had shown me once when he was teaching us how to protect our minds from outside influence as kids when we just learned how to mind link. I could still feel Nate on the edge of my awareness, pacing like a caged animal.
But I needed to be alone.
I leaned against the tree and closed my eyes, trying to calm my breathing.
A twig snapped behind me and I froze.
Every instinct in me roared to life.
I turned, rising fast, already halfway into a crouch. My body tensed for a fight or flight response, my senses stretching out. The sound was too close. Too real. The rustle of leaves too deliberate.
Someone was here.
It could be a rogue. Or worse. Or-
Then I saw him.
And everything in me stilled.
“Max.”
Chapter 62
