12
C
“Everyone says Lucas is a playboy, but actually the one who doesn’t take the relationship seriously is you.”
William had keen insight, I didn’t dare answer carelessly.
He simply stopped at the stair landing.
“Back then, when our parents wanted to abort Lucas, I desperately kept him, saying I’d take care of my brother in the future.”
“Lucas isn’t smart or outstanding, all the family’s focus and resources were directed at me. He started rebelling in his teens. He told me, he
couldn’t choose his birth family, he only hoped to be able to choose his own wife in the future.”
William said this, then looked up at me: “I know you don’t believe it, but Lucas loves you.”
This statement was magical, making my heart warm for a moment.
But I quickly regained my rationality: “Brother, Lucas marrying me is only because of that child…”
William quickly retorted: “So, he defied the whole family to be with you after the miscarriage, but didn’t accept Mia who was pregnant?”
“A man only loves a woman’s child when he loves the woman.”
My throat suddenly tightened.
Then I noticed a key word.
“Brother, what did Lucas… defy?”
Seeing my shock, William realized there were some things I didn’t know.
“At first, no one in the Lucas family was willing to accept you, they even strongly opposed it. I had promised to let Lucas choose the girl he liked, but the social gap between you two was too big, you were from a single–parent family, and seemed cold–hearted, I was afraid he’d get
hurt…”
“But Lucas knelt and cried, self–harmed, went on hunger strike, begging our parents to give you a chance. He begged me not to make things difficult for you, not to hurt you…”
“I know my brother best, he’s always been rebellious and disobedient. It was because he truly had feelings for you that he was willing to lower his head like that…”
Something in my mind came crashing down.
I remembered, when Lucas came back from the family home at that time, he told me.
Dad, Mom, and Big Brother all liked me very much.
I thought this marriage had been easily arranged.
My expression changed repeatedly, from doubt to shock to sorrow.
William calmly added: “The matter with Jack was also Lucas asking me to help you get revenge, he said you had been bullied too badly, it hurt
his heart…”
I gripped the stair railing, my body feeling like it was falling into an endless abyss, unable to hit the ground.
Lucas, that carefree playboy, he did all this for me?
11:00 AM
<
PP
William gave me a sad look: “Perhaps only you, who are overly pessimistic about human nature, and some outsiders who don’t know the inside story, would fail to see that Lucas loves you.”
The favoritism I had felt countless times in the past turned out not to be my illusion.
Lucas… really loves me?
I suddenly became mute.
I walked out the door in a daze, Lucas came to support me.
Opening the car door, there was a thermal bag in the passenger seat.
Oden and peach oolong tea.
I had indeed been hungry for a long time.
I stuffed it in mouthful by mouthful, my cheeks puffed out, abnormally quiet.
Lucas took out a tissue, silently wiping my tears.
For the first time, I asked Lucas: “Do you love me?”
Before, I thought the answer to this question was obvious.
Lucas hadn’t expected me to ask this.
P
He hesitated for a moment, then answered firmly: “Yes, I love you. Girls have always chased after me, but I only chase after the girl I like.”
I opened my mouth, realizing it was indeed true.
“Then… why do you still play around so much after we got together…”
Lucas stared at me for a long time, somewhat helpless, and somewhat sad.
“Because you don’t love me.”
I was stunned.
Trying to say something to make up for it, but unable to speak.
Lucas comfortingly stroked my head: “Love is jealousy, care, pettiness, possessiveness, irrationality. But your emotions are too stable, you never manage me, no matter what outrageous things I do you don’t care. So I understand, there’s no intense love in your heart.”
Fate plays tricks on people.
The understanding I had cultivated, in Lucas’s eyes, had all backfired.
13
Lucas said: “My parents are the same, never having any expectations of me, treating my emotions like air… Apart from those brief thrills, I have no other way to alleviate the pain…”
Lucas’s gentleness and coldness both stemmed from being ignored.
“Every time I indulged, it was me courting you. I kept finding women to provoke you, hoping you would care about me.”
“If you would just get a little jealous, or act coquettish with me, control me a bit, I would give up everyone else… But you never once spoke up
to me…”
Everything was misaligned.
Lucas didn’t lack women or money, he lacked love.
11:00 AMD
Lucas didn’t lack women or money, he lacked love.
What he needed was the 21–year–old me, the love–brained girl killed by Noah.
The current me had long lost the ability to trust and love.
I cried irrationally, asking over and over again.
“Do you really love me? Even if you know I’m a terrible person? Even if you know I had ulterior motives? Do you love me even if I’m a bad
woman?”
Lucas pulled me into his arms: “Ava, I know you’re greedy, cold–hearted, like to act, and still like another man, but it’s okay, I love you.”
All calculations are ineffective in the face of love.
True romantics really only appear in wealthy families.
Back home, I eagerly pulled Lucas into the bedroom.
in just one night, the dynamics in bed changed.
I dominated Lucas, unprecedentedly passionate.
He gripped my waist, emotions rolling in his eyes.
“Ava…”
My tears melted into his honey–colored chest.
I’m sorry, I’m really sorry…
Extreme guilt overwhelmed me.
It turns out, love really does come full circle.
All those who betray true hearts will be punished, tormented by guilt.
First Noah, then me.
! started seriously dating Lucas.
We went to bed and woke up early every day, walking the dog together.
I cooked, he helped me chop vegetables.
I made cocktails for him, he helped me play games.
I took him back to Urumqi to herd sheep, he accompanied me to Norway to see the Northern Lights.
The beautiful memories were countless.
We loved intensely, with no more regrets.
On an ordinary morning, I went to William to break off the engagement.
The condition was for him to send me abroad to study, and give me a large settlement fee.
I couldn’t enter into marriage and family with a guilty conscience.
Lucas was my best solution.
But I wasn’t Lucas’s best option.
11:00 AM
<
We loved intensely, with no more regrets.
On an ordinary morning, I went to William to break off the engagement.
The condition was for him to send me abroad to study, and give me a large settlement fee.
I couldn’t enter into marriage and family with a guilty conscience.
Lucas was my best solution.
But I wasn’t Lucas’s best option.
For this, William asked to talk with Lucas and me.
Halfway through the conversation, William suddenly doubled over in pain, accompanied by dry heaving.
Lucas hurriedly sent his brother to the hospital.
His eyes were red–rimmed, silent.
1 quietly accompanied him.
Outside William’s hospital room, on the 857th day of knowing each other, Lucas and I officially broke up.
Soon after, Lucas voluntarily entered the family company, starting from the basics.
I heard his parents were introducing him to suitable young ladies from good families.
He had lost a lot of weight, maintaining his distance.
The day I left the country, it snowed in the city. Noah, who had disappeared for
a
long time, came to see me off.
Back to the beginning of our relationship.
“Don’t delete me, send me videos when you have time over there…”
¡ said okay.
Lucas arrived late, he put a hat on me, wrapped a scarf around me, and finally looked at me deeply.
Ten thousand meters above the ground, frost patterns crawled up the window.
I remembered a winter night two years ago.
At that time, I had just gotten together with Lucas not long ago.
I uncharacteristically acted willful, disturbing his gathering, sending a message asking him to come out and eat with me.
No other reason, I just felt a bit lonely that day.
Lucas replied instantly, coming out of the Yandu Mansion with the smell of cigars on his shoulders.
Fifteen minutes later, he appeared in the small restaurant I had chosen, skillfully and warmly sterilizing the utensils for me.
We each wore one of a pair of woolen gloves from the small shop next door, costing just over ten dollars.
Heavy snow fell on us, whitening our heads in an instant.
He grabbed my other hand and stuffed it in his pocket, very warm.
My heart fluttered, very lightly, only I heard it.
Then, Rachel ran over and jumped on his back, and that sound disappeared.