Nature is not a place to visit 8

hapter 8
*“You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don’t ever count on having both at once.”*
*Robert A. Heinlein*
Rae and I didn’t fight often, and when we did, it was usually over within the hour. If she lost her temper with me, she’d
come bearing snacks and something that sounded suspiciously close to an apology.
And there was no amount I could annoy or tease her that a caramel macchiato and a good gossip session couldn’t fix.
But two days after she’d stormed off the infirmary steps, neither of us had apologized. Not that *I* needed to apologize –
she’d been the one to call me weak and afraid because I didn’t think we should thrust ourselves into a war.
Maybe it was optimistic to think she’d cool off and smooth it over so soon but after two days? I couldn’t remember the
last time I’d gone two days without talking to Rae.
Fortunately, I didn’t have much free time to sit around and think about the rift between my best friend and me. With
Alpha Roman’s death and the Blood Moon encounter so fresh, Hudson had us running extra patrols around the clock. He was nervous they’d come back to make sure Alpha Roman was really dead – or just finish the job and wipe us all out.
That anxiety hung over the rest of the pack like a storm cloud. We were all on edge. Sleep-deprived too, but at least that
could be fixed with ample caffeine.
As the pack elders busied themselves with taking care of the refugees, I took on extra patrols with the warriors that had
recovered from their injuries. There wasn’t much to do but run the border in circles, but at least I got to do it in wolf
form.
It had been days since I’d gotten to shift so I wasn’t going to complain about feeling the soft forest floor beneath my
paws.
*Have you checked the south border, Ollie?* Luke’s voice rang through the mind link. Fortunately, he’d recovered well
enough to shift and run patrols with the rest of us.
*Just ran through there*, I mind-linked back. Have you hit the east border yet?
*On my way*, he said.
*Pick up the pace, slacker,* I teased.
*Slacker? Is this coming from the girl who spent the time in between her shifts napping?*
*Hey, breaks are breaks however you spend them*, I said.
*Stop joking around, you two. We all need to stay completely focused right now. Ollie, you head to the west border*,
came the voice of Marcus, one of the most experienced warriors in our pack.
*Got it,* I replied.
I shot through the forest as fast as I could, the breeze running through my brown fur as I twisted directions. I’d been
shifting for years, and yet, I’d never get over the freedom of it. Neither did my wolf.
When she was stuck inside my head, she felt like a separate entity. One that would occasionally stir or groan when I
downed another shot of espresso, but otherwise, she was locked behind the barrier of my mind. But when I shifted, that
changed.
When I shed my skin and sprouted fur, that barrier broke down too. We became one, thinking and feeling and moving as
one. I reached the west border in no time, pacing through the vacant area and using my heightened senses to try and
pick up unfamiliar scents.
*Looks good over here,* I said.
Just as I was about to ask Marcus for more orders, a new voice rang through the mind-link this time – Hudson.
*Everyone, meeting in the pack house now.*
My stomach dropped. If Hudson was calling a meeting with everyone, that could only mean one thing: he’d made a
decision about how to handle the Blood Moons.
And I had a feeling it was one I wouldn’t like.
*Guess I’m not going to be able to sit this one out.*
I disappeared behind one of the large trees on our territory to shift back, swiftly covering myself in the bundled-up outfit
I’d found at the base. Since we shifted back naked, it was normal for us to leave extra sets of clothes around the forest in
case we had to shift back suddenly.
I emerged from the trees as soon as I was covered, spotting Luke in the distance. His expression was serious, and he’d
likely connected the same dots I had about the meeting. I fell in step beside him as we made our way to the pack house.
After a few moments of silence, he asked quietly, “Do you think he’s going to send us into war?”
“I don’t know.”
“There’s no way I’m going back into another battle,” he said, “They nearly wiped us out like it was nothing. Took Alpha
Roman down like it was nothing and wounded the rest of us. My arm still feels like it’s shredded.”
Although Luke and I rarely talked about serious things, I was relieved to know he at least agreed with me about the Blood Moons. He didn’t want to jump headfirst into a fight any more than I did.
*Now if only Hudson and Rae can see reason.*
It didn’t take us long to arrive at the pack house. The room was even fuller than usual, and amongst our own, I could
spot some of the refugees in the crowd. There was a lot of whispering, quiet conversation, and grave faces.
Off to the side, I spotted Mia standing alone and looking out of place. I started to make my way over to her, but Luke
grabbed onto my arm. “What are you doing?” he hissed, “You’re not walking over to go talk to that witch, are you?”
I raised my eyebrows at him. “So, what if I am? Besides, how do you know she’s part witch anyway?”
“Oh, come on,” he said, “Everyone has been talking about it. Even her own pack members are wary of her.”
“What does it matter?” I retorted, “She’s one of us, and she came with the Storm Claws. Plus, she’s pretty nice from what
I can tell.”
*What is this, high school? All Luke needs is a blonde wig and a short little pink skirt and he could play Regina George.*
“Yeah, but she’s still a *witch*,” he said lowly. His eyes darted over to her like he was afraid she’d overhear us, suddenly
sprout a wand, and start throwing spells his way.
“Don’t tell me you’re worried she’s going to hex you or something,” I said.
“Well, it’s poss –”
“You’re an idiot, Luke,” I cut him off, walking away.
I made my way over to Mia, and she smiled when she saw me walk over.
“Hi,” she said shyly. “I didn’t even see you come in.”
“Well, this place is packed like sardines,” I replied. “Have you been settling in okay?”
As we stood together, I realized that Luke might not have been the only one wary of Mia. Several of our pack members were giving Mia the side-eye, their eyes narrowed in suspicion.
*They’re looking at her like she’s some cartoon villain.*
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Supposedly, the rivalry and mistrust went back centuries – all the way back to when the witches supposedly cursed the
Moon God into an eternal sleep.
“Yes, it’s so nice here,” Mia said, “Your pack lands are beautiful and everyone is so…nice.”
“Okay, look, you don’t need to lie,” I said, “I know that not everyone has been very welcoming to you. I’ve seen how
many glares you’ve gotten since I walked over here.”
Mia forced a smile. “It’s okay,” she said, “I’m used to it. The fact that you’re all letting me stay here, that’s all I care
about.”
“They’ll warm up to you, I promise,” I said, “And if anyone says anything to you…well, I’ll kick their ass.”
She chuckled, but before I could say anything else, I caught sight of Rae standing across the room. She was standing
amongst the warriors, her face blank. Her eyes flickered to me, and I could’ve sworn I saw some emotion flash through
them, but she’d already turned away before I could figure it out.
“Thank you all for gathering so quickly!” Hudson boomed from the middle of the room, drawing everyone’s attention
immediately. He looked just as solemn as the rest of us.
*Please don’t make us go to war*, I begged silently to myself.
“I know that the past twenty-four hours have been chaotic,” he started, his gaze sweeping across the room. He stood
strong and tall – like an Alpha. “We lost our Alpha, the man who’s led this pack since before I was even born. Since the
attack from the Blood Moon pack a decade ago, we’ve been through some tough times…but Alpha Roman has done
everything he could to see us through them.”
They were nods and murmurs of agreement all over the crowd.
“When that attack happened, many of us lost loved ones. My sister and I lost our parents, and this pack lost their Beta,” Hudson continued, his eyes momentarily finding mine before he looked back at the pack, “But Alpha Roman made the
difficult decision to forego revenge in order to rebuild what was left of our pack. He chose peace over anger, and that’s
never easy.”
I held my breath.
*Is Hudson going to say what I think he’s going to? Is he really going to opt for peace over revenge? Perhaps our
conversation last night did more good than I thought.*
“Alpha Roman had to choose what’s best for the pack,” he explained, “And after what happened last night, after the
Blood Moons took our Alpha from us, I need to do the same.”
*Come on, Hudson. Don’t order us into a war.*
“That’s why I’ve decided the Blood Moons can’t get away with this,” Hudson finished. “They deserve to pay for what
they’ve done to our pack – for the deaths they caused ten years ago, and for the ones they caused last night. I plan to
send warriors into Blood Moon territory to kill their Alpha. An Alpha for an Alpha.”
My heart plummeted.
*No, no, no.*
More murmurs and nods of agreement broke out over the crowd.
Hudson’s eyes found mine once again, and I tried to convey as much sisterly disappointment into one look as I could.
*Don’t do this,* I tried to say with my eyes. *We’re not strong enough to go against the Blood Moons*.
“But I also understand that not everyone wants revenge,” he continued, his eyes on mine, “And I can’t ask you to pursue
revenge if it’s not what you want. That’s why the attack will only happen with those who volunteer to fight – I will not be
ordering anyone to go if they don’t volunteer.”
There was silence throughout the room after that.
*He only wants volunteers? That’s not a move from the Werewolf Wars for Dummies book.*
When you went to war, most Alphas – including Alpha Roman – hand-picked their warriors. You needed your best men
and women out on the field, regardless of whether they wanted to be there or not.
It was possible to get out of small missions if you had a good reason, but using only volunteers? That was new.
Considering that some of our best warriors were still wounded and recovering from the fight last night, it was also a risky move too.
*But I guess this is Hudson’s way of compromising.*
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“The Blood Moons deserve to pay for what they did!” came the voice of one of our more experienced warriors on the
other side of the pack house. “I was there when they took our Alpha down last night. I couldn’t save Alpha Roman then,
but I don’t intend to let those monsters off scot-free. I’ll volunteer for this fight. You can count on me, Alpha.” His face
was full of determination even though I could see that he was still limping from the previous battle.
Hudson nodded. “Thank you, Adler.”
“Me too,” came another voice. Marcus. “I fought alongside Alpha Roman and your father for years, Alpha. If it’s an Alpha
for an Alpha you want, I’ll make it happen.”
“Well, there’s no way in hell I’m sitting this one out.”
My stomach dropped when I heard that third voice – Rae.
Much like Adler and Marcus, her face was more determined than ever. She looked even more fired up than last night.
Angrier. “The Blood Moons took my parents, and I’ve been waiting for the opportunity to get revenge for a long time,”
she said, “I was a little worried you were going to chicken out there to keep the peace. Glad to see you’ve come to your
senses, *Alpha.*”
Hudson cleared his throat. “I’m doing what’s best for the pack,” he said, “And there’s no shame in anyone who wants to
sit out the fight.” Once again, his eyes flickered to me.
More voices joined in after Adler, Marcus, and Rae. Some of them were even refugees from the Storm Claws, looking to
take revenge from the pack who’d stolen their home. There was a shift in the room with each new volunteer. You could
feel it – hope.
For the first time in a long time, our pack was fired up and hopeful. They saw an opportunity to take back from the pack
who’d taken so much from us.
And yet, I couldn’t bring myself to share that hope. Maybe I was just an eternal pessimist – or a “debbie downer” as my
mom used to say – but volunteers or not, we weren’t walking into a fight we could win.
The Blood Moons had been able to take out our most experienced warriors while they were healthy. The only difference
now was that we were sending those same warriors into battle – just wounded and still injured from last night.
*Plus Rae.*
I glanced over at my best friend. She was high on the thought of revenge just like the rest of them. She was one of our
best warriors and she’d definitely make a difference, but…would that be enough?
*To even stand a shot, we’ll need every able-bodied warrior to volunteer.*
*Even then, we’re probably toast.*
*Which means that my best friend is also toast.*
I exhaled through my nose so sharply that Mia, who was still standing beside me, glanced my way.
*I can’t just sit here and twiddle my thumbs while I watch my best friend go off to possibly die.*
*We may be in a fight right now, but I’m pretty sure rule number one of having best friends is also having their back*.
*Even when they’re determined to risk their life for revenge.*
I took another deep breath.
“Count me in,” I said, drawing the attention of the room, “I’m not sitting this one out either. I’ll volunteer.”
Hudson’s eyes widened, and for a moment, it looked like he was going to say no. Outright refuse me or come up with
some excuse as to why I had to stay here.
I held my ground and kept my eyes on his.
He still looked torn when he finally nodded.
A couple of nearby pack members patted me on the back and thanked me for volunteering, but their voices faded into
the background as I realized what I’d just done.
From the corner of my eye, I could see Rae’s mouth drop open in surprise.
*Well, I guess I just signed myself up for war. *