Chapter 63
Sapphire.
When he left, I stood there for a moment, staring at the closed door, feeling my chest tighten. I had told him I didn’t want him here, but a small, irrational part of me had assumed he would still make some effort. That he would somehow push past my resistance and try to stay.
But he hadn’t.
What was I thinking? This moment took me back to the girl I was back in his pack, with all the maltreatment and punishments I had endured, I was still hopeful that he would realize that the mate bond was precious.
God, I am such a fool.
I shut the door and slid down until I was sitting on the floor, feeling the tears sting my eyes as they began to fall. The weight of everything pressed down on me, and I felt myself crumbling. All the emotions I’d kept bottled up spilled out in heaving sobs.
I didn’t cry like this when I realized I was alone with no one to help me.
I didn’t cry when I realized I had broken free from the clutches, that I had left everything behind. That I would have my own identity now and not be known as ‘the murderer’s daughter.‘
I was deeply disappointed with how things had turned out. I cried till I couldn’t breathe anymore. I counted to ten in my head to soothe me till I felt the oxygen flow through my lungs.
I didn’t expect Charlie to still be there, but suddenly I felt his tiny hands on my cheeks, his little fingers brushing away my tears as best as they could
“Mommy,” he whimpered, his own face scrunched up, tears threatening to spill from his wide, concerned eyes. Seeing him there, crying with me, broke my heart even further. I felt a surge of guilt; he was just a little boy, and he shouldn’t have to see me like this.
A mother should be able to bear all kinds of pain just to shield her child from any.
“Oh, Charlie,” I whispered, reaching out to pull him into my arms. “I’m so sorry. You shouldn’t have to worry about this.”
I held him tightly, rocking him gently as he nestled against me. The warmth of his small body, his heartbeat close to mine, gave me a strange sense of comfort even as I tried to console him. My fingers combed through his hair as I murmured softly, trying to reassure him and, maybe, myself too.
“Listen,” I said softly, pulling back slightly so I could look into his tearful eyes. “You don’t need to worry about what’s going on between your father and me, okay? That’s grown–up stuff. What matters is that you get to know him, get to understand him, and have time with him. That’s all you need to think about right now.”
He looked up at me, his face serious beyond his years. “But… what about you, Mommy?” he asked.
I felt a fresh wave of emotion hit me. “You don’t need to worry about me,” I said, managing a faint smile for his sake. “What’s happening between your dad and me… it’s just something between adults. It’s complicated, and it’s not something you should have to carry, okay?”
Charlie’s brow furrowed as he absorbed my words, his gaze locked onto mine with an intensity that surprised me. He was so young, yet his empathy ran so deep. It hurt to see that he was already trying to understand things that even I struggled with.
After a long pause, he nodded, slowly, as if he was doing his best to accept my words, though I could tell he was still conflicted. I realized I was going to convince him, he thought his father was a bad man.
He was but he didn’t need to know that. As cruel as Aragon may be, I don’t think he would be a bad father, the way he looked at Charlie said a whole lot. Like it was the thing he was missing, the thing he needed in his life to make it whole.
If Charlie wanted to get to know his father then who am I to stop them? He needed a father figure and there was only so much I could do to prevent that from happening.
Now that he has found us, I would let them know each other but it wouldn’t mean anything for us. I have already gone down that road and I was not interested in knowing more, if only my treacherous heart would agree with me.
“Okay, Mommy,” he whispered, his tiny hands still resting on my shoulders. “But please don’t cry.”
His words were so innocent, so full of kindness, that I couldn’t help but feel a lump form in my throat again. But I swallowed hard, wiping away the last of my tears as I forced a smile, “I won’t cry,” I promised him, even though I knew it was a lie.
For his sake, though, Linanaged to hold back, keeping my face as calm as I could. If he knew how much pain I was in, he would refuse to see his father so I would try to hide that as much as I can.
I couldn’t burden a child with these stupid emotions. What is one man that I couldn’t handle?
As I hugged him dose, my thoughts drifted back to Leah. She had shown up, out of the blue, saying she had come on her own. But deep down, I couldn’t shake the suspicion that she had something to do with all this, that she had been the one to push him to come, putting me right in the maddle of a mess I had desperately tried to avoid.
It wasn’t like Leah to be so… involved. Or maybe I had just been naive, thinking she’d stay out of it. But something told me that she’d orchestrated this nudged him to show up, perhaps even convinced him that seeing me would somehow fix things. And now here I was, trying to pick up the pieces of my own heart, while Charlie, my sweet little boy, was left to deal with the aftermath,
I don’t think I would forgive her for this. She meant well but it wasn’t in her place to make that decision for me. I should have decided if I was ready to see him or talk to him, not her. Now, she has brought him here, cue the rollercoaster of emotions.
Geeting
1902
Chapter 63
“Mommy?” Charlie’s voice brought me back to the present. I looked down, seeing his face still creased with worry, his big eyes searching mine. “Are you really okay?”
I took a deep breath, mustering up every ounce of strength I had left. “Yes, sweetheart,” I lied, smoothing his hair back with a gentle touch. “I’m okay. I’m just… I’m just tired.”
He nodded, his little hand slipping into mine, and he seemed to accept my words, even if I could tell he wasn’t entirely convinced. “Will… will Daddy come back?” he asked after a long pause.
I swallowed, feeling my heart twist painfully. “I don’t know, honey,” I admitted softly, squeezing his hand. “But that’s something he and I need to figure out. And no matter what, I want you to know that you’ll always be loved. By both of us. Especially me,”
Charlie nodded again, the earnestness in his expression making him seem so much older than he was. “I know, Mommy. But I just… I want you to be happy.”
I smiled at him, touched by the purity of his concern. “I know, sweetie. And I want you to be happy too. That’s what matters most to me.”
He seemed to think about that for a moment, then surprised me by wrapping his arms around my neck in a tight hug. “I love you, Mommy,” he whispered
“I love you too, Charlie,” I murmured, holding him as tightly as he held me. I closed my eyes, letting his warmth wash over me, grounding me in the midst of my chaotic emotions.
As I sat there, feeling the weight of his tiny frame in my arms, I made a silent promise to myself. No matter what happened between his father and me, I would protect Charlie from the mess, from the pain. I would do everything I could to make sure he felt secure and loved, even if it meant keeping my own heartache hidden from him.
Eventually, Charlie pulled back, his eyes now dry but still filled with a hint of sadness. “Mommy?”
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“Will you… will you really be okay?”
I forced another smile, stroking his cheek. “Yes, Charlie. I’ll be okay. I promise.”
He nodded solemnly, as if he believed my words could make everything right. And in that moment, I almost believed it too. Almost.
Setting
